don’t be THAT guy: 3 year-old in the restaurant guy

Posted: April 25, 2010 in Uncategorized

My wife and I don’t have kids.

I’m glad if you got ’em–if that’s what you wanted.

You and your kids suck

Do me a favor–don’t bring ’em to dinner at nice restaurants. I know you and the wife need a break but it’s not fair to the rest of us. You gotta pay a sitter unless your kid is really well behaved.

I got news for you, your kid isn’t it.

You won’t enjoy it even if you pretend to. Get takeout or order a pizza.

You ‘re not in the nice restaurant club any more. You’re in a lot of clubs I’m not in now.

Chili’s, Fridays, Applebees–they’re for you now. You made the choice, not me.

Get a sitter or wait 18 years.

My basset hound can’t come. Your 3 year-old shouldn’t be allowed either.

Don’t be that guy.

  1. ginny says:

    Don’t even want to ask where you and Sue were tonight!

    We used to ask for the non-smoking section – now we ask for the no children seating!

    Our kids are all grown up and over 20 (supposedly grown up). Let me just post for the world to see that my 25 year old just dyed her hair pink 10 days before her wedding.

    HELP ME. Could you please seat me in the 2 drinks for the price of 1 section?!

  2. Rachel Brady says:

    I’m not that guy. But when we were pre-kids, we went to dinner at a nice place with That Guy and His Wife and Their Ill-Behaved 3-year-old. Awful, terrible, unrepeatable. You are correct, sir.

  3. Kymm says:

    I agree with you – and I have kids – my angelbrats! They are aged 10 yrs up to 19 yrs and I love them to bits. When I am going out to a nice restaurant and not one of the typical family restaurants – I want to relax, kick back with friends, have fun chatting over good food, some wine and great company. I want an adult atmosphere in a ‘nice’ restaurant – not a family one – there are after all plenty of choices for a family atmosphere.

  4. Pasquale Palumbo says:

    My daughter is 2. She stays home when we go out to a nice place. No ifs, ands, or buts. She’s barely allowed into my favorite pub with us.

  5. D. B. Dean says:

    Normally my hubby and I agree. We leave our three boys at home or take em to chevys. But for my last birthday i wanted to go to my favorite restaurant. Its a nice high end italien place. I dont know what my husband did but our three sons were so well behaved that almost every single diner commented on how great and well behaved our boys were. Best birthday present ever. They were well dressed, quiet and well behaved the whole time. I am sure we will have to pay for a shrink later in life but what ever my husband did worked….

  6. marycunningham says:

    I’d rather see your Bassett Hound, Tom, instead of some kids I’ve run in to! But, I have seen some very well-behaved kids, too. I really think it should be determined by how the children behave in the restaurant. If they don’t cause a disruption and actually enjoy being there, then why not? The experience could make for lasting memories.

  7. Christine McCann says:

    Amen, brother!

  8. Cindy Adler says:

    Do you know how to get a kid to settle down? As you are pointing at your kid say “Little Boy/Girl Misbehaving!” It has worked for us every time! 3 to 20 years old!!!

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