FREE PSYCHOTHERAPY THURSDAY:What Your Strip Club Name Says About Your Psychopathology

Posted: March 4, 2010 in FREE PSYCHOTHERAPY THURSDAY, Uncategorized
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Yesterday I asked for some help on my new novel.

There’s a strip club in it and I was looking for an interesting name for it. I posted a question on Facebook.

What happened after that was clearly astounding.

Hoardes of people, who presumably don’t have enough to do at their day jobs, responded.

Frankly, the suggestions were disturbing.

As a service to those who made suggestions I will conduct a psychoanalysis on some of the suggestions. Hopefully, we can all learn something.

Jay K

Pole Position

Clearly Jay is both a fan of watching women dance and Nascar. What can we deduce from that? Safe to say he did not hit triple figures on the SAT exam.

Tina W

One Stop Plastic Shop

I believe as a child Tina was breast fed from falsies and will never develop as a mature adult.

Diane M

Peel and Play

I am not sure if this is a reference to shrimp, bananas or disrobing. It doesn’t matter, it’s odd. So is Diane and you should stay away from her.

Vinnie B


Vinnie is clearly on a different spiritual plane than the rest of us. Personally, I don’t want to board that plane and fly towards Nirvana with Mr. B to a place of enlightenment where women dance without clothes.

Geo A

Franks and Beans

Geo, it’s time for help. I know your Ballpark franks plump when you cook them but you’re spending far too much time in the kitchen.

Pasquale P

Mammary Lane

Okay, ‘Squale we all know what Freudian stage you’re stuck at. It’s not a good one for a man over the age of 4.

Robert W


Bob, I know you spend a lot of time in Hollywood and you probably have gone numb to the idea of blond women in lucite heels, but did you read the question? I know you’re old but is that what happens?

Michael L

Honey, I Was At My Art Class

Mrs. L you’ve got issues to deal with. Those stick figures Mikey’s been taping to the refrrigerator indicate that those impressionist classes he’s taking are leaving the wrong impression on him.

Davida D.

Jiffy Lube

Davida meet Jay. Jay likes NASCAR. You two can hang out. You can talk about cars going fast and maybe play with Matchboxes. Just stay out of society.

Vicky A

Ben Dovers

I’m assuming IP Daly and Who Flung Do were already taken? Vicky you’re a grown woman and somewhere along the way something went wrong with your development. Really, really wrong.

And the most disturbing response award goes to:

Bill D.

Please Don’t Take Off Your Pants and Jack It

Right this way Mr. D. Please take your meds and arts and crafts will be starting soon. Part of being a good shrink is knowing when there is no hope. For Bill D there’s less than no hope

  1. Jen Forbus says:

    I laughed out loud at Robert W’s responses and his rationale for them. That was great. My greatest chuckle came from your “you guys are sick”…Uhm, who asked for these in the first place?

    • Christine says:

      I think my favorite was Vicky A.’s “gin n bare it”, but that sounds more like a place to be advertised as a gentlemen’s club instead of a strip club. 😉

  2. Jen Forbus says:

    Oh, and my offering…how about The King’s Palace? I know Bob wouldn’t like that one, but…

  3. D.B. Dean says:

    I also offered several other witty ideas = One in french! I cant believe you picked jiffy lube. What do you want = my husbands a mechanic (err Sr. Master Technician). I kept trying to think of a way to work in “lubing the chassi” …ohhhh wait…my husbands joke is that a car needs “gold plated bushings” You could call it the Gold Plated Bushing and then its a combo strip club/auto repair center – giving the guys something to do while they wait for their cars…

  4. Vinnie says:

    Looks like I’ll be flying solo… :ba-dum-ch:

  5. BD says:

    Jeeze, I’m glad I didn’t proffer “Mae Q. Harter!”

    In Indy. there’s a place that I actually does have a nice name that rolls off the tongue nicely.
    It’s a bit of a double entendre but not something like “Hugh Jass’s.”

    It’s called “The Classy Chassis.”

    The talent is very welcoming to horrible bands making their way around the country. I’ve heard that, anyway. From a guy. A guy from the block.

  6. Doering says:

    I am enjoying this post way too much. I tried to get on your facebook page to see the rest, but FB won’t let me in. Damn you, facebook. I’ve got to sign up.

    And I’m a total wonk so I just googled strip club names (there’s hundreds to choose from, categorized by state or everything else you can imagine) but, of course, I was directed straight to porn. Wow, didn’t see that coming AT ALL. Thing is, I’m at work. Which can’t be good.

    You love all these commas. I know you do.

    • tjs9261 says:

      Not on Facebook? Still listening to 8-tracks? Did you hear the Beatles are thinking of splitting up?

      I’m glad my blog is a guilty pleasure….

  7. Sharon says:

    Those names AND your comments were hillarious! Thanks for the laughs and Lotsa luck with your novel! =)

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